Thank god my dream didn’t get fulfilled

Years ago I had a dream, to have Rupees 100 crore in the bank. Then the yearly interest would be enough for me to make a good living. I’d be free to make the kind of helpful things I wanted to, without worrying about making a certain amount of money every month. 

Thank god this dream of mine didn’t get fulfilled. Because some years later I met someone who inherited a lot of money after death of a parent and decided to quit their job. 

The result? That person is the most negative one I’ve ever met. Because they don’t have anything to do. When mind is free then negative thoughts come by default, otherwise it takes hard work to develop positive thoughts. 

Coming to that person, I would tell them many times to develop a positive outlook but they wouldn’t listen. They would keep throwing their negativity on me. One day I read 80-20 rule and realised that the small time I spent talking to them was a big cause of my unhappiness. I decided not to talk to them for a while. What happened thereafter? I could notice significant changes in me. I finished 3 books in a week, something that would have taken months earlier. I could blog again, and plan about what I wanted to do next. Till the time I was talking and caring for healing them, I was in a negative zone. 

That made me realise that had I also inherited tonnes of money then I’d have lost the will to do hard work. Perhaps I’d have been complacent in making things that solve problems. Also, just because someone has a lot of money, doesn’t mean they’re rich. There are people who do good for the ones around them, while constantly working on ways to earn more and upskill themselves. I now have more regard for the hardworking person who reinvents themselves at every age. 

 

I get overtly attached to all my clients. Which is meh.

 I don’t know whether it’s my strength or weakness, that I believe in giving my best to every client I work with. 

If a client isn’t satisfied then I am unable to sleep properly at night. I want to ensure that they get the best solution for their needs.

If there’s a meeting then I turn up before time. Mostly the other party makes me wait, somehow I can’t do the same. 

I try to remember every promise I make to them so that I live up to it. I don’t make false promises just to win a client. 

For me no client is small or big. All are equal, hence their needs must be fulfilled. 

I make extra efforts to know what the client wants and how I can help them succeed. 

I speak less so that I can focus more on actual work delivery. If results are there then they will talk. 

I don’t commit to what I cannot do. 

Which is why, I wonder if it’s my weakness that I get overtly attached to every client I work with. 

Because not every client is the same. 

It’s not easy being an Indian doctor

 A lot of struggle and hardships are involved for someone who wants to become a doctor in India. 

First comes the competition. It’s so much that most bright students don’t get into MBBS. Seats are less but applying students are more. Just because someone didn’t get into MBBS, doesn’t mean they lack intelligence and skills. 

Then comes duration of the course. Most students live outside their homes for studies, in far off places, quickly mastering a language they aren’t familiar with. Engineering students will tell you about studying a week before exams and passing with decent grades, but not medical ones. While an engineering student gets a job towards end of 4 year course, struggle actually starts for a medical student. They need to study further and have no idea what specialisation they’ll get, unless their family members have arranged a paid seat. 

And so while some students get into MD, most don’t, despite repeated attempts. A few end up doing multiple diplomas to compensate so that they’ll at least have something. Again, just because someone didn’t get an MD seat, doesn’t mean they lack skill and brilliance. 

Masters in medical is quite hard. I have heard stories of students doing 36 hours duties without a morsel of food. They are treating patients while also studying. Several of them don’t get stipend, and if they do then the university draws all the cash from ATM accounts. The compromises one has to do to get their degree!

And while their masters is going on, comes the question of getting married. A few get married but not all of them, because they don’t want their education to be interrupted. Some want to study further because they feel they won’t be able to make a good career with just one masters degree. So when time comes to get married, many are still struggling. God bless the family members sponsoring their education, because these days it is quite expensive to make your child a doctor. 

Finally when the time arrives to start practice, pat comes the question, where? Because while software engineers keep changing their companies and cities, as per whichever pays them better, this facility is not for doctors. It takes them more than a decade to establish their practice, while being at the same place constantly. We hear about digital nomads in tech sector who earn in dollars and spend in Rupees, but not so in doctors tied up to a single location. When covid like thing comes then software engineers work safely from their homes but for doctors there’s no other option. 

Think before saying that doctors these days are cheats, greedy, inefficient and what not. You have no idea of the struggle they go through and the efforts it takes for someone to become a doctor in today’s time. 

When you truly love a girl

There’s a girl whom you love and she happens to love you back. You both care for each other. You spend years together, sharing so many beautiful moments. 

How would it feel to know that when she was born, people told her parents that it was their bad karma?

How would it feel that people told her family they were unlucky?

How would it feel that the girl who’s given you so much of love, was told upon her birth that a son should have been born?

How would it feel that lavish celebrations weren’t held after her birth just because of her gender?

How would it feel that her grandparents gave preference to her uncle and aunt because they gave birth to a boy?

How would it feel to know that she gave you so much of happiness, but her own arrival on earth wasn’t celebrated?

It doesn’t make any family inferior, if they have a girl instead of a boy. Yet, there is clearly a partiality if a boy is born. If data on abortions is made public, we’ll be shocked to know names of some prominent people who killed their child simply because it was a female. 

More than caring for whether it’s a boy or a girl, what matters is how you raise the child. Not all sons care for their parents in old age. Not all daughters are victim of abuse and as honest as they pretend to be. 

Characteristics of an average Indian patient

 1. Is impatient. Expects you to see them the minute they reach your OPD. 

2. No matter how much you do for them, their family would seldom regard you for going out of the way to cure them. 

3. Believes in taking the law in their hands in case something accidentally goes wrong at your hospital. 

4. You treat them right a hundred times , they’ll stay silent. Go wrong just once and they’ll ask all their friends to write negative reviews on the Internet. 

5. Thinks that doctors are a money printing machine. 

6. Wants to get everything free while charging money in their own line of work. 

7. Negatively troll the one who speaks the truth, without realising that it’s due to behaviour like theirs that Indian doctors are leaving their profession, sending kids abroad and remaining in perpetual fear of getting wrongly killed. 

End Note: I haven’t said that every Indian patient is like that. All I’ve said is how an average Indian patient is, based on personal observation. If you don’t have any of the above traits then congrats, it means you’re not an average Indian patient. 

• Yaju Arya