Respected legal law enforcers,
Jai Hind! Satyamev... er, please excuse.
I have a heartfelt request. Kindly contemplate fulfilling it.
My request is to -->> Start conducting classes for general public, over how to deal with Punjab Police.
That is
1. How to secretly slip money in their pockets.
2. How much amount to be given for what all occasions.
3. Which tone to be used for conversing with Policemen that makes one sound "assertive" yet "co-operative".
4. Convincing the target audience that how this act is actually more beneficial for them rather than taking the normal legal route.
Let me illustrate that using few anecdotes.
Recently my friends were hanging around in a car, and after some time the driver removed his seat belt for fleeting few seconds, but that was enough for him to get caught by the police. He is so naive that while conversing with the policeman he did not understand my friend's signals of "under the hood" and "documents at home". So he was given a
Challan, and had to visit courts on multiple occasions to get his Driving License and RC back. Standing in heat, waiting for several hours, only to hear that his date was postponed. It took several weeks for the matter to get resolved. But then it is not Punjab Police's fault that our system is like this, is it? Rather they offer a more efficient way over which such hassles are prevented and the money one spends is much less than the overall time. Time equals money, ain't it?
In another instance a male colleague hailing from another state paid Rs. 10 to the policeman for not wearing a helmet while driving a two-wheeler. This offended the policeman as he felt he was being paid peanuts. My seemingly innocent friend didn't know that this is Punjab where people have the habit of making it large. Be it farmhouses, Butter & Cream laden items, private tuition fees, fertilizers, or few recent events involving hard drugs.
There are numerous examples of how the common human needs to avail services of Police. Registering FIR over "petty thefts", protection from "local goons", staying out of involvement in "controversial court cases", etc. A normal human like me cannot imagine all such aspects, but a Policeman knows them in detail, and it'd definitely help if they provided an exhaustive case study to the general public.
To avoid a Deja-vu of what happened between Doctors and THAT episode of Satyamev Jayate, let me utter the following.
I have genuine respect for the Police force. Controlling crime isn't easy and some even risk their lives. Standing in heat all day and keeping a check on what's going around, is something everyone cannot do. People of Punjab owe a lot to Policemen for removing the terror situation of 80's and early 90's thereby restoring normalcy. There are several honest cops out there whose image takes a beating due to the dishonest ones.
As I type this I am not shedding any tears. Thus preventing another controversy of them getting branded as "fake".
Amen. May peace prevail.
Lets wish that Punjab Police does hold these informative sessions for general public. It would benefit all parties involved. I have more hope over these sessions getting conducted, rather than the system undergoing makeover.
Mahaul Theek Hai!
P.S. - 1. The above article was a work of fiction, inspired by real incidents.
2. Lets see how many readers reply back saying "
Arrey Punjab ka hi nahi, sab jagah ki Police ka yahi haal hai...".
