Why I am not a successful human

If, like me, you also do not consider yourself as successful, then read on.

What makes me call myself as not successful? Simple. Go make a list of people that you consider as successful. Do I feature on the list? I confidently assume not. So I am not successful.

These are the reasons I have been a consistent non-achiever.

1. Nazar Suraksha Kavach.

I return home from a tiring day at work (it’s not easy pretending to be busy for 12 hours so many days a week) and to relax myself I turn on the TV. All I see on Entertainment channels are ads of Nazar Suraksha Kavach (wondering what’s that then click here) giving me various reasons to go for it and save myself from all the troubles. That is no matter how well educated and spiritually enlightened I am there is no escaping the wrath of a ‘buri nazar’ from people around me.

The intellectually challenged that I am for giving preference to logical thinking over these tried and trusted mechanisms (click here), I do not succumb to wearing a Nazar Suraksha Kavach on my body.

2. Unfair and lovely.

If I share my views on a religion I do not practice, I’d get a barrage of lawsuits thrown at me.
If I raise incidents of corruption being practiced somewhere, I'd receive life threats.
If I question certain people over their decisions, the lives of people close to me would come under a scanner.
So this means there is definitely something undoable in these actions.

Every year we get a barrage of new advertisements on TV depicting that your talent or degree or persona or diligence won’t fetch you as many rewards as having a fair skin would. Going by their consistent coverage on our Television it means there’s definitely something divine about them.

It’s my shortsightedness that I do not make use of these products for I consider god gifted features as the prettiest.

Image Source - Lowe and Partners

3. Don’t follow any Successful Guru.

There are so many Successful Guru’s out there dolling out mantras for success. Mantras as in
“Recite these words from this book and you’d attain success in life”.
“Follow this procedure and there would be no evil influence on you”.
“My purpose is to help you, so keep following my sermons and you’d remain on the right track”.

Instead of believing in them I believe in philosophies such as all humans are equally divine, relying too much on someone else’s words restricts your own thinking abilities, and no one can solve your problems other than you yourself.
So instead of ‘Babaji ki kripa’ I receive a ‘Babaji ka thullu’.

Image Source - Comedy Nights With Kapil

4. Don’t follow the herd.

I do not have a role model that I follow blindly. Because I firmly believe that every human has his / her own destiny and following someone else means we let go of what is destined for us.

I see people who implement life steps based on what others have done. If you consider someone as successful and they've been doing this, then thank you for further validating my prophecy.

So you see, my priority is to follow my natural instincts rather than follow someone else’s. I successfully let go all of it.

5. Chain emails.

I still get emails from people stating that bad luck would reach me if I did not forward it to 20 people within the next 24 hours. In all such instances I end up applying principles of Computer Science that offer no explanation as to how could 0’s and 1’s have such divine powers, and hence I end up hitting the Delete button. Beautifully disastrous steps.

But if you are unlike me and do believe in those chain mails then here goes.
Forward this article to 3 people in the next 16 minutes, otherwise a lot of calamities would occur on you.
If you are a medical student then you would not get married unless your studies are completed.
If you are a Software professional then you would get to work on a legacy project with nearly zero documentation.
If you are an arts graduate then your love interest would publicly address you as ‘bhaiya’ / ’behen’.
If you are from a business family then your folks would make you post graduate before you can start working.
If none of the above then the winning lottery ticket would be the one that you did not buy.
Which lottery ticket? Well, why ask when you aren't going to win it anyway?

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography

ए Manager, मेरे Claims Approve करवा दे....

(Is the poem based on real events or a work of fiction, it should be inferable for the reader)

ए Manager, मेरे Claims Clear करवा दे

Rejected Entries पर हाँ की मोहर लगवा दे

शुरू के इक्कीस दिन जो होटेल में बिताये थे

Hertz टॅक्सी से ऑफीस के चक्कर लगाये थे

रोज़ रात को उत्कृष्ट व्यंजनो के स्वाद लिये थे

शर्ट धुलवाने के लिये सौ रुपये खर्च किये थे

अपनो हर्षोउल्लास के किस्से दोस्तों को सुनाना

उन्हे अच्छे से जलाकर स्वाद लेना

किसको पता था की नज़र लग जायेगी

अच्छे से मेरी बैंड बज जायेगी

HR वालो ने जो ज़ख़्म दिये हैं

उन घावों पर नमक अभी बाकी हैं

ए Manager, मेरे Claims Approve करवा दे

अश्क़ों के साये में दिये जलवा दे

8 बजे के बाद मैं ऑटो से जाता हूँ

पेट भरने के लिये खाना मँगवाता हूँ

अक्सर मैं Weekends पे Office आता हूँ

Clients को अपने Cell से STD Calls मारता हूँ

वो तन्हा रातें, वो बेपनाह चाहतें

जो तुमने दी, वो सुरीली बातें

क्या खोया, क्या पाया, बस इज़्ज़त नहीं गवाया

इसलिये ना चाहते हुए भी Client का फोन उठाया

ए Manager, ये लम्हे तुझसे और कुछ नहीं मांगते

बस इतना, की मुझे Footpath पर आने से बचा ले

ए Manager, मेरे Claims Approve करवा दे....

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography

-----

ae manager, mere claims clear karva de

rejected entries par haan ki mohar lagawa de

shuru ke ikkees din jo hotel mein bitaaye the

hertz taxi se office ke chakkar lagaaye the

roz raat ko utkrisht vyanjano ke swaad liye the

shirt dhulwaane ke liye sau rupaye kharch kiye the

apno harshoullas ke kisse doston ko sunaana

unhe achche se jalaakar swaad lena

kisko pata tha ki nazar lag jaayegi

achche se meri band baj jaayegi

HRIS walo ne jo zhakham diye hain

un ghaavon par namak abhi baaki hain

ae manager, mere claims approve karva de

ashqon ke saaye mein diye jalwa de

8 baje ke baad main auto se jaata hoon

pet bharne ke liye khaana mangwata hoon

aksar main weekends pe office aata hoon

clients ko apne cell se STD calls maarta hoon

woh tanha raatein, woh bepanah chahatein

jo tumne di, woh sureeli baatein

kya khoya, kya paaya, bas izzat nahi gawaaya

isliye na chahte hue bhi client ka phone uthaaya

ae manager, yeh lamhe tujhse aur kuch nahi maangte

bas itna, ki mujhe footpath par aane se bacha le

ae manager, mere claims approve karva de....

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography

Poem Maa Ka Pyaar (माँ का प्यार)

mujhe meri maa ki yaad bahut sataati hai

mere liye woh aaj bhi jeeti jaagti hai

garmiyo mein pankha jhulakar sulati thi

sardiyo mein halwa banakar khilati thi

use kuch ho jaaye, par main salaamat rahoon

achchi baat sikhaana, jab main ulta boloon

khud bhukhi rehkar, apni roti mujhe dena

jaane kyun uska, mujhe itna pyar karna

main uspar chillata tha, voh bura nahi maanti thi

meri nadani ko veh, achche se samajhti thi

log uska saath dete hain, jo unke kaam aaye

maa hamesha ek samaan rahe, chahe kuch ho jaaye

mujhe bade hona hi tha, aur main ho gaya

akhirkar badalna hi tha, aur badal gaya

vidya paayi, naukri paayi, shaano shaukat paayi

par maa ki dhalti umar, kabhi nazar na aayi

aaj main kuch bhi kha sakta hoon, khareed sakta hoon

par woh maa ka pyaar, kabhi vaapas nahi la sakta hoon

paisa to kabhi bhi aa sakta hai, aur aa jaata hai

lekin woh maa ka pyaar, aaj kaun dilwa sakta hai?

मुझे मेरी माँ की याद बहुत सताती है

मेरे लिए वह आज भी जीती जागती है

गर्मियो में पंखा झुलाकर सुलाती थी

सर्दियो में हलवा बनाकर खिलाती थी

उसे कुछ हो जाये, पर मैं सलामत रहूँ

अच्छी बात सिखाना, जब मैं उल्टा बोलूं

खुद भूखी रहकर, अपनी रोटी मुझे देना

जाने क्यों उसका, मुझे इतना प्यार करना

मैं उसपर चिल्लाता था, वह बुरा नहीं मानती थी

मेरी नादानी को वह, अच्छे से समझती थी

लोग उसका साथ देते हैं, जो उनके काम आये

माँ हमेशा एक समान रहे, चाहे कुछ हो जाए

मुझे बड़ा होना ही था, और मैं हो गया

आखिरकार बदलना ही था, और बदल गया

विद्या पाई, नौकरी पाई, शानो-शौकत पाई

पर माँ की ढ़लती उमर, कभी नज़र ना आई

आज मैं कुछ भी खा सकता हूँ, ख़रीद सकता हूँ

पर वो माँ का प्यार, कभी वापस नहीं ला सकता हूँ

पैसा तो कभी भी आ सकता है, और आ जाता है

लेकिन वह माँ का प्यार, आज कौन दिलवा सक्ता है?

The interview that just happened

(I’d leave it to the reader to imagine how authentic are the experiences described in this article).

 Interviewer questions – Tell us something about you?

What I really wanted to say – Abbey resume tere saamne rakha hua hai, padh to le…

What I ended up with – Good evening. I’m Yaju Arya, having graduated as a B.E. in Computer Science from so-and-so College, am employed with ____ for the last ____ years in ____ organization primarily working on ____ technologies.

Interviewer questions – Why would you like to work with us?

What I really wanted to say – PAISA!

What I ended up with – I've been an admirer of your organization ever since you launched ____ . My impression of your organization has always been on the positive side and it’d be a dream for me to work for someone whose consistency I personally admire. I have a close contact working in your firm and based on what he tells me I can infer that in certain positive aspects it is definitely a cut above the rest.

Interviewer questions – Tell us where you would see yourself in 5 years from now?

What I really wanted to say – Tab tak to main kahin aur switch maar chuka hounga.

What I ended up with – Being a functionally inclined individual, I see myself enhancing my skill set to the level of a consultant in ____ domain. After knowing about few success stories of people in your organization and seeing the various heights they attained, I’d take that as a prima facie inspiration for defining the base of my career in your company. I can only hope for the best (smiles).

Interviewer questions – Give us a very strong reason why we should hire you?

What I really wanted to say – Arrey lena hai to lo, nahi lena to na lo…

What I ended up with – Based on what you are looking for, maybe I fall short in some aspects. But I can assure you that whatever work is offered to me I would deliver to the best of my ability, like I have done in my previous organizations. It helps that I have heartfelt (smirks) respect for what your organization has been doing consistently for so many years and has managed to survive in some really tough times. I might not be the ideal candidate, but I would certainly be the most devoted. All I need is a chance; trust me I’d deliver to the best of whatever I can.

(Images by Arjun Suri Photography. Cool guy in shades - Siddhant Suri).

Perspective (the girl with Amazon Kindle)

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography

“Remember, you see in any situation what you expect to see.”

― David J. Schwartz

A group of 4 young men were roaming around in Sector 17, Chandigarh; when they spotted a young girl sitting alone on a bench.

The 1^st one passed a remark that was based on her being a girl.

The 2^nd one mustered something on her family referencing the Amazon Kindle in her hands.

The 3^rd one uttered comments that were targeted at her Western dress.

The 4^th one said something that had to do with the direction the world was going in.

`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`.`

This is what they said.

1^st – “She’s a girl which means her family did not indulge in female foeticide and raised her.”

2^nd – “She is going through stuff on her Amazon Kindle which means her family educated her and she reached certain levels of literacy.”

3^rd – “She is wearing a Western dress means like us Indian men she has the freedom to choose what she wants to.”

4^th – “While we do have apprehensions on some of the events around us, the world is definitely going in a better direction in quite a few aspects.”

 

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography

"Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth."

Marcus Aurelius

Widows are being burnt around us

(The following article is a conversation between two 20 something men called Sarvam and Devam over the former sharing views on why he feels the ancient practice of Sati is still alive in modern times, though a widow isn't burnt physically she is made to undergo constant torture by the ones around her. I'd leave it to the reader to imagine if the conversation is real, fictitious, or a piece of fiction inspired by real life incidents).

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography

Devam - The other day I was reading a book on Vedic Literature and was amazed to learn how advanced India was several centuries ago.

Sarvam - That's true. Ain't for nothing we were called The Golden Sparrow!

Devam - But I wonder how come so many evils came up in our society. Sati, for instance.

Sarvam - Yup.

Devam - Thankfully Sati got eradicated where...

Sarvam (Interrupting) - What makes you feel Sati is over?

Devam (puzzled) - Raja Ram Mohan Roy worked proactively towards getting it abolished. You don't read about such incidents these days, do you?

Sarvam - Physically yes, Sati is no longer practiced  But mentally it is, society kills quite a few women in case that tragic incident occurs.

Devam (shaking head) - I need more info on this.

Sarvam - Okay let me ask you a question.

Devam - Yes please.

Sarvam - Think of a girl in her mid-twenties, the kind you studied with in college. There is a lot of jubilation in her family when she gets married with fanfare, complete with all traditional rituals.

Devam (closes eyes, then opens) - Hmm, okay.

Sarvam - Imagine her changing relationship status on Facebook, receiving greetings from all over, putting a lot of photos with her soul mate who'd be her everything and adopting his family as hers.

Devam (keeps eyes closed for a while) - Right.

Sarvam - She is all settled in her new home and her family is considered a "happy family", with some of her female colleagues using the word "lucky" for her on specific occasions such as receiving an anniversary gift.

Devam - Bingo.

Sarvam - Now, close your eyes, feel her happiness and celebrate her existence  Slowly, slowly. Yes. And now... (pauses for a minute)

Devam - What?

Sarvam - She loses her husband in a very sad incident.

Devam - (becomes motionless and does not utter anything).

Sarvam (after a minute) - Now tell me honestly. What would be the reaction of people around her, especially those from older generations?

Devam (in a low voice) - They would say that it is fault of the girl. She must have done some bad karma for which her husband suffered.

Sarvam - Exactly. At her husband's funeral there'd be a lot of people, mostly her contemporaries, deriving sadistic pleasure out of her misery without showing any real empathy.

Devam - (nods head).

Sarvam - Forward to a week after the incident, with the girl still coming to terms with what happened. Now, what clothes should she wear?

Devam (after few seconds) - Society would expect her to wear white..

Sarvam (cuts him) - Exactly. Society. Please continue.

Devam - But she should wear what she wants to. It is her life.

Sarvam - In all probability she wouldn't remain dressed like all the time or do acts in order to evoke sympathy. She would get up and do what she feels is best for her and find out a will to live. She may even imagine that her husband's soul is still alive somewhere and do the kind of things that used to make him happy, like dressing up the way he loved to. She would make herself as strong as possible and find out reasons to survive in this world.

Devam - Yes, that's true. Most people around me would want to lead a good life despite what happened while trying to re-discover the purpose of their lives.

Sarvam - Precisely. Now imagine her in a decent attire, wearing a newly stitched pair of clothes with accessories that compliment her well. There's a grace on her face and it is inspiring to those looking to seek inspiration towards battling the hardships of life.

Devam - Salute to what she's doing.

Sarvam - This is what you feel. Don't you think that there'd be nasty people judging her at every moment and saying stuff like "her husband passed away and she is dressing up in this manner?". Am sure you can think of people around you who have such a thought process, and many are from well-educated families.

Devam - Sadly this is indeed the case. They won't be having the guts to say it on her face, but she might be able to make out such people by the power of intuition.

Sarvam - Right. Long before she got married, she used to dress up well and work towards leading a good life. She's being who she really is. We don't expect a man to roam around in Kurta-Pyjamas all his life if he was in such a situation, do we?

Devam - No, we don't.

Sarvam - And then who should take care of the girl? Her parents 'donated' her during marriage, so it is responsibility of in-laws as she's their daughter now. Aren't there families who'd rather send her back to her parent's home asking them to take care of her, projecting as if it was due to her that their son got killed?

Devam (pauses for a while) - Ideally it is the responsibility of in-laws and not parents for they are her new family members. She left behind everything to get adjusted in their home, and they are priority for her.

Sarvam - Parents are willing to sacrifice themselves for their son. It could involve selling off their ancestral land so as to invest towards son's education or business. How many would do so for their widowed daughter-in-law?

Devam - I.. believe, very few.

Sarvam - And before I go further, let me remind you of our topic of discussion. I feel that Sati is still prevalent in today's times, even though physical body of widowed wife isn't burnt along with her husband. And before I conclude my viewpoints I'd leave you with a set of questions that I'd let you ponder over.
What if her in-laws did take out their hard earned savings towards setting up career of their daughter-in-law?
If they did, how many of them would be openly appreciated by society for setting example within people?
And even after all this, what if the girl met another man in her life and felt the need to get married? She got married in the first place to complete few elements that were missing in her life. Wouldn't it be appropriate if she was given another chance to re-live them?
Wouldn't it be duty of her in-laws to "donate" her to new family as parents? This is what every parent does towards their child by not expecting anything in return irrespective of the gender, isn't it?
And lastly how many people from the society would care to observe that despite the presence of a new man in her life, she hasn't forgotten her first husband and still holds their limited memories in a good stead?

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography

The Great Indian Cobbler

(The following post is a fictitious story).

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography

Once upon a time, in a mildly populated city, lied a narrow lane where 24 Cobblers ran their shops. It was a place that had to be seen to be believed, the moment a passerby went they’d start shouting requesting him to avail their services that included shoe polish, repair, basic cleansing, and sole replacement. All of them were quite proficient in their job skills and they mingled quite well with each other without any professional envy.

One fine day a new Cobbler came and decided to set his shop there. He was cheerfully included in their clan. But as it turned out his skills weren't as proficient as his contemporaries, and the customers he’d make were either those that were new to that ally or were attracted towards his face that had elements of physical attractiveness plus a lyrical tone in his voice.

On an average when his fellow Cobblers would get to work with 30 Customers in a day, he had to settle for 10. Thus it wasn't easy for him to make ends meet, and despite his best efforts he was not able to pump up his skills to precision.

The remaining Cobblers were friendly with him, and looked up to him as their junior who had a long way to go before posing a serious threat. Persistent competition meant he’d have to do something special in order to survive, and would have to bring in the “X factor”.

He hadn't saved a lot of money, so one day he went to his most trusted friend, borrowed whatever amount he could procure, and went to the Stationery Shop near his home. He purchased a cardboard and some pastel colors. While at the shop he noticed a book with attractive cover bearing the name “The Shining Ruby”.  He borrowed a small piece of blank paper from the shopkeeper and scribbled the word “Shining” on it, along with few more words.

Next up he went to a Garage Sale and brought himself a cushion, a pair of old slippers with attractive design, and an old shoe brush tracing its origins to the British Era. On the way home he passed by a book shop, from where he purchased few unsold magazines at throwaway prices and also a fancy looking notebook with Glitter pen.

The Cobbler still had some money left; using most of it he brought few Chocolates and reached home. He gave them to his adolescent neighbor on pretext that she’d write “Shining Shoe Shop” on the cardboard using pastel colors in a way that it’d get noticed by anyone looking at it. She took the Chocolates and did what was told to her.

Next morning the Cobbler put up the board at his place. His fellow contemporaries had a glance at it and wondered what he was up to. Their expressions of amusement were prominently visible. But what amused them further was when the Cobbler started shouting in his characteristic tone announcing the rates which were thrice of what others were offering. They took jibes at his business model, for he was not proficient enough to set such a high price for his services.

Three hours went past and not even a single human stopped at his shop.

Then one finely dressed gentleman came, probably thinking of trying out the USP of that Cobbler. He offered him cushion to sit on, and as he removed his shoes for repair he bought forward the pair of fancy slippers which though worn-out were definitely easy on the eye. The Cobbler showed his unique Shoe Brush to the customer citing it had its roots in the era of Indian freedom movement. He offered whatever magazines he had for his customer to read while he was doing his job.

As the Cobbler was done with his job and client ready to leave, he showed him the Notebook and requested an entry describing his experience at the shop. By now the customer was so impressed at the experience that he chose to overlook the quality of work done by the Cobbler. He thought that since he had charged more money than the remaining ones there must be something special about him. So he wrote a lovely entry in the Notebook citing the experience as “the one for the classes”.

As he left, the Cobbler’s colleagues gave a glaring stare thinking what a fool that man was to have spent his money on something that he could have got for one-third the price, that too of better quality. And incidentally the Cobbler did not make any other deal that day, thus he incurred a loss. But his calm composure indicated he had confidence over what to do next.

The next morning, as he was setting up his shop, some of his contemporaries tried to discourage him and offered their knowledgeable services for improving his skills in the craft. But he simply responded with a mild smile. And as people passed by, he started his newly developed chant, but with an added suffix referring the Notebook entry. It did seem to have helped, for within the first hour of business he got his first customer. He treated him the same way as he did yesterday – cushion, slippers, old shoe brush and magazines. Naturally he made him write in the Notebook as well, which of course turned out to be a positive entry. The Cobbler made two more customers that day on similar basis, and thus his daily income was nearly equal to what was till a week back.

Fifteen days went past, and by now the Cobbler had started breaking even. The average daily count of customers was less than what used to be once, but his revenue had increased. What had decreased was the amount of physical labor he used to do in a day.

He decided to procure some more visually attractive stuff. So he went to the market and purchased the kind of material that would better the “experience” his customers had at the shop. He also purchased an additional Notebook with appealing hardbound cover.

By the time a month was over, profits had started pouring in. That too with average number of daily customers less than what was a month ago. This implied that the income was more and his physical efforts were less.

He developed a set of loyal customers, who were unique in the sense that they’d look down upon those who were availing services from the remaining Cobblers. The loyal ones cited themselves to be humans of class tastes and proudly proclaimed being ardent fans of The Great Indian Cobbler; the one who was a cut above the rest and therefore his high fees was justified. It was a matter of time that word spread about his prowess on various mediums such as Print Media and Social Networks, with no one daring to criticize him since it would have implied they were humans of sub-par standards. Interestingly no one questioned the opinions of other Cobblers who were experts in the field and certainly knew much more than the self-professed critics.

And a day finally came when the Cobbler crossed his ex-monthly average of 10 daily customers. As the numbers kept increasing, the Cobbler thought of a way to manage his ever expanding business. He started search for a largely out-of-work Cobbler and was fruitful in that. He taught him tricks of the trade and helped set up another “Shining Shoe Shop” labeling it as his franchise and put a condition that he’d get a fixed set of revenues from each order. This worked in favor of both the Cobbler and his resource.

To ensure that he’d earn as much amount of money from the franchise as he was earning from his own establishment the Cobbler increased rates of his shops, citing his was a premium service and they had to be charged. While some of his customers didn't take the additional change in a favorable manner, most did and thus not only revenues of his shop increased but so did that of his franchise, thus his resource started earning more money than before.

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Today The Great Indian Cobbler has a business empire. He has hired people to take care of the same and doing even less work than before; enjoying the premium churning out from the franchises he’s provided. He has got few competitors now, who also operate by offering premium services, but it’s not his responsibility to tackle them, rather it belongs to the executives working under him, who have put their personal life at stake working day & night so that their bank balance would keep on increasing. It helps that the younger generation considers it acceptable to spend so much on the services being offered by The Great Indian Cobbler, as they aren't aware of how things were back in the days of their ancestors.

His once-rival cobblers have either passed away in poverty or faded into oblivion taking up other jobs. Even today they do not hold a high opinion on the quality of services being offered by the main protagonist of this story. And then they say that we Indians have not been able to preserve the art that was once unique to the nation.

At the same time no one really hates The Great Indian Cobbler. For they desire that whatever happened to him, happens to them as well.

(The above piece is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to someone living or dead would be an interesting co-incidence.)

Photo by Arjun Suri Photography